Wow ... months and months of hard work ... doing hours and hours of cardio ... lifting pounds and pounds of weight ... eating lots and lots of clean food ... then spending minutes on stage showing it off. What an experience! I won Masters Figure Tall. But for me ... it wasn't the fairy tale ending that I had visualized for weeks as I prepared for this competition. I invited so many people to follow me on this journey through my blog. So many people encouraged me along the way. So many people saw my progress. So many people anticipating great things on stage. I wanted to give YOU something more ... because you gave ME so much ... so much L.O.V.E.! Well I can't lie and say I was "just thrilled to make it on stage". I wanted the big prize. But I didn't get it. Well ... let me rephrase that ... I didn't get the big prize given out at the show ... but more on that later. I want to whine a little more first ... because I can. It's my blog and I can whine if I want to ... hahaha! I wanted to be "the best" but I wasn't. I wanted to give all of you who followed me something more to celebrate ... something more to be inspired by. I wanted to give myself that "you can do anything if you put your mind to it and work hard" feeling. I wanted to be the SUPERSTAR! Before I continue I have to say that ALL the women who won awards last night were definitely deserving!!!
My eyes opened at 4:30 this morning thinking about what went "wrong" ... what I could have done better ... what I did ... what I didn't do ... and I even thought for a moment "How embarrassing. I encourage all these people to follow me and this is what I give them???" Sigh ... okay I'm done feeling sorry for myself. I just had to get it out of my system ... since I can't work it out in the gym for at least a week (gotta rest the body for a while).
Done with the negative thoughts! Let's move on ...
So let's talk about all the absolutely WONDERFUL things about this journey. First ... all of the L.O.V.E. I received from all of you ... words cannot express how AWESOME it made me feel to get all the messages of support yesterday ... and throughout my journey ... I have tears in my eyes just thinking about it! It was an incredible show of support. It was the BEST part!!!!! The next best part? All the AMAZING women I met along the way ... and at the show! Darci, Brandi, Julie ... were my faves! You guys ROCK!
And the journey itself was awesome. I love training. It's my stress release. I feel happy when I'm working out. I often break out into a big grin when I'm sweating it out on the treadmill. LOVE IT! I didn't hate dieting (can't say I really loved it though ... hahaha ... who does?) I can't wait to get back into the gym ... but I know ... I need to rest for at least a week ... that will be tough.
So going forward ... no more pity party. First things first ... rest, relax, enjoy some of the food I've been missing (in moderation of course!), get feedback from the judges and my trainers, and start planning for the next challenge ... and I haven't completely decided what that's going to be yet ... but I do have some ideas! I'm open to suggestions as well.
Stay tuned! Just because that competition is over ... doesn't mean I'm done yet!
L.O.V.E.!
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